These are my personal thoughts...kind of mushy tonight. Feel free to skip this post.

Tonight I sit in gratitude for the many, many blessing which have been poured over me my entire life. I had a wonderful childhood, I married the type of man I always hoped to marry and I have three, almost four, healthy children. Really what more could I ask for?

Pops has been gone at Zion's camp the last several days. I didn't know how much I would miss him. Last night the boys put on our wedding DVD. I sat there and watched it and was overcome with gratitude for where the last twelve years have taken us. Definitely not the path I would have thought, it's been better than I could have orchestrated myself. As I watched the video my memories went back to that night and the fun we had at our reception. Then I thought of that first year of marriage...an interesting one. Then memories of the second year, third and fourth, then memories of Buster coming along in that fourth year and I thought how much joy has been found and maintained over the years. I'm not saying life is perfect or trial free...it's not. I just know that I feel true joy. I've learned this joy is not bought with any amount of money but sought for and worked for. The Lord has blessed my life and I will be forever thankful for the mercy that has been shown me.

To Pops: I love you, I love you, I love you. And thank you for loving me back.
(I know I can write this and he won't get upset cause he never reads this blog. :)

I'm excited to have a solid sleep tonight. I didn't sleep well with him being gone...maybe it was the fact that all three boys and I were in the same bed. Or maybe it's the fact that I might or might not be a bit of a wuss when he's gone at night. :) Luckily I had both Smith and Wesson sleeping in the same room with us.